Surviving a Yeti Attack There are four things you want to do in case of a Yeti attack. It is extremely important that you follow my advice if you want to live. The Yeti is more dangerous than a thousand polar bears duct-taped together with shark teeth and bull horns and maybe even laser eyes. 1. If you see a Yeti start to approach you, don't run or make eye contact. Just pretend you don't see him and go about your business. 2. Once he comes closer towards to you to see if he wants to kill you and eat your shattered corpse, you should run as fast as you can away from the Yeti. If you see a power up mushroom, eat it. 3. Since his stride is over 6 feet long, he will catch up in no time and grab you in his large hands. Whistle the tune to The Andy Griffith Show and soil yourself. 4. When this fails to deter him, accept your fate. Your only chance is to offer him your most tender of sweet meats on your person, and hope he is grateful for your manners. With some luck you will return to your loved ones alive. Granted, without legs and arms, but a survivor.
5. Rub bacon grease all over your hiking partners clothes while in camp, act completely confused and surprised when hes/shes getting the brunt of the Yetis wrath. Then start running in the opposite direction screaming "Whata I do!" "whata I do!" until you reach safety....works every time
Damn...no wonder people act like I'm not there. We're just gentle giants that eat berries and smoke salads.
QUOTE Good thing one of us can keep a low profile! Skunk Ape~ Total Posts: 8 Pappythelonghairedyeti~ Total Posts: 14,077 Yeah I think we know who THAT would be.
