NORTH KOREA SAYS WHITNEY HOUSTON TOUR WOULD BE "ACT OF WAR" PYONGYANG (CT) – A defiant statement from the North Korean government claims that the reclusive Communist state would view a tour by R&B singer Whitney Houston as “an act of war.” The statement, which was printed in North Korea’s official newspaper, described rumors of a tour to promote Houston’s newest CD “Just Whitney” as “a deliberate provocation.” “Whitney Houston is a threat to our sovereignty… we are not afraid to launch a military strike on America to prevent this tour.” White House officials said they are “disappointed” by North Korea’s stance but declined to comment further. Officials at the Department of Homeland Security said that Secretary Tom Ridge was considering raising the threat level to “Orangish-Red,” the appropriate threat level for when a diva plans a comeback tour, but had not made a decision yet. The threat level was raised to Orange in the wake of rumors that Liza Minnelli would be taking the Mrs. Robinson role, complete with nude scenes, in the Broadway version of The Graduate. North Korea’s provocative, often bizarre public statements, which usually denounce the Bush Administration’s hardline North Korean policy, have increasingly focused on Western pop stars. In December North Korean leader Kim Jung Il described the band Chicago as “a threat to world peace” and actor Michael Douglas as “the living ball of Western Satan pie.” South Korean officials, anxious to defuse the escalating crisis, proposed a compromise where Houston would give a concert on pay-per-view instead of a U.S. or world tour, but the idea got a frosty reception in Pyongyang. Houston’s volatile husband, singer Bobby Brown, was quoted as saying he would “tunnel under” Korea’s demilitarized zone to “get those Commie motherf***ers.” While no official decisions have been annouced, Brown is rumored to be at the Pentagon, meeting with Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld.
I never liked...the streets of San Francisco, some smarmy prick in a suit, an' that fucker with the big nose..
